A Girl Named Earl

Lyrics by Ronny Criss             Copyright 2005

Well I was born and raised till the age of five

In itty-bitty town just barely alive

Some might call it a redneck neighborhood

Now I couldn’t complain, I could barley see

I was a little baby boy named Ronny Gene

Hell for all I knew the whole dawn world was good.

But I couldn’t say the same for the girl next door

she was pretty as can be but man was she sore

when people would call her by her first name her hair would curl

well nobody knows what her mom was thinking

or maybe even what her mean daddy was drinking

all I know is that life ain’t easy for a girl named Earl.

Now I remember them saying something about her great granddad

How he was good in the trenches when the shit got bad

And therefore they felt their daughter should carry his name

Now I don’t care how honorable a man can be

If he saved a million people or if he saved me

To name your daughter Earl, man that’s insane.

Well as you can guess she grew up real quick

Kickin’ and scratchin’ and man she could hit

There wasn’t a boy in town that wanted to mess with that girl

And I remember the day she knocked me on my ass

When my friend called her name and started to laugh

And with a mouth full of blood, I fell in love with a girl named Earl

Now it took a while before she’d start believe

That I was after her and not the novelty

And after a dozen beatings she figured I’d understand

But the more bumps and cuts I received

The more and more she fell in love with me

And for Earl, the girl next door, I became her man 

Not before to long I made Earl my wife

We had three kids who all came out all right

A little baby girl and two boys who look like one another

Now it came real easy naming the twins